Friday, July 3

What a Day

Today has been one of those days, the days that make you want to throw your hands up in the air and ask the universe, "Really?!"

Sure, we've had some rough days here and there in the last month, particularly the scary night Bryce came crashing into our worlds. But nothing prepares you for a day when your son is put back on the oscillating ventilator, and then bumped up to 100% oxygen and still continues to desat (desaturize his blood, i.e. not enough oxygen is being pumped throughout his little body) continually for hour after hour after hour.

All the while, Caleb and I stand by his bed, with our hands laid on him in a futile attempt to calm and soothe, or to at least encourage some oxygenation. Perhaps a minute or at the most a few go by where there are no alarms and he doesn't appear to be litterally crawling out of his isollete, but these moments are few and far between.

We look at eachother in desperation, knowing that the doctors and nurses are doing all that they can. We search desperately for a respiratory tech when he's satting 50% and there is no one in sight. Although we know there is little they can do we expect to see them running.

Six long hours and many tears later here we are, asking you all, yet again, for your prayers for Bryce.

Dr. Hodges said that his blood gas tests reveal he is still oxygenating his blood well enough but that if they can't settle him enough with the pain and sedation medications to get his ventilator settings down or if his blood gas tests show he is no longer oxygenating his blood sufficiently then we may have to consider another rounds of steroids. He said that this could become life threatening.

We simply refuse to believe that Bryce won't make it but we need your prayers as reassurance, please.

We will be "rooming in" tonight, which means we'll sleep here in a room on the same floor as Bryce in case they need us quickly. This provides a small dose of comfort to two very weary, new parents but also serves as a reminder that we are not over reacting to the seriousness of Bryce's condition.

Please, please keep us in your thoughts and prayers over the next day, especially throughout the night.

Pray for us to see the light at the end of this long, dark tunnel. Pray for strength and endurance for Caleb and I so that we may be here for Bryce, in whatever capacity he needs us to be. Pray for Bryce's little lungs to heal, regenerate and strengthen. Pray for our poor parents who are here every minute with us, standing by our sides, feeling the same pain that we are but with even less resources for helping us than we have to help Bryce. And don't forget to thank God for our many blessings: for Bryce, for family and friends, for doctors and nurses and especially for love.

Thank you all so very much.

6 comments :

  1. Katrina,

    I am praying now for Bryce and for y'all. Please, ask them about Nitric Oxide. It's a wonderful thing that literally saved my son's life.

    I will continue praying.

    Tami

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  2. Praying for you guys and love you all so much!
    Montoya Family

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  3. Bryce, Katrina and Caleb,

    We are thinking of you, and wish to somehow give you some of our strength, so you can overcome this and get better.

    Hugs
    Peter Anne-Claire and Julianne

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  4. Katrina and Caleb,
    I wish I had even one word that I could say that would bring a smile to your face or lessen the pain you feel right now. Since I've always been vocabularily (I'm quite sure that is not a word) challenged, I'll just say, "I love you." I am praying for you and Bryce everyday and I will be sure to spend extra time tonight asking God for the return of Bryce's stability and thanking him for the love he has brought into your lives.
    All Our Love,
    Mary and Jeff

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  5. I am praying hard for your son tonight.

    Lisa

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  6. Katrina and Caleb,

    Tonight is the first time I read up on your story and as I read through your posts...the memories came flashing back. I remember NICU hell. I remember it all too well. I will be keeping Bryce in my thoughts and prayers that he beats this step back. I have been there and if you need anything please let me know.

    Sincerely,
    Rachel M.
    ^Jaxon^ ^Colin^ and ^Courtney^ born at 23w6d
    www.tripletbutterflywings.com

    ReplyDelete

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